Harry Potter 7B Review (Spoilers!)

Okay, since Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 sold over $476 million worldwide on opening weekend, the ban on HP7B spoilers is officially being lifted.  Let's talk about the film!  

Overall, I loved it. It's my favorite of the series.  But of course, because the book is always better, some of the choices really left me wondering, "WTF?" or "You chose this for the final cut?"

The Split Where HP7A meandered aimlessly around the British countryside, HP7B took a far more action-packed route. HP7B picks up at Shell Cottage in the wake of Dobby's death and then steamrolls through the densest 11 chapters of the book. David Yates had a little over two hours to pack in essential plot points (Gringotts, Diadem, BATTLE OF HOGWARTS, Snape's Tale, Harry's death, King's Cross, The Showdown) so the viewer basically dives in headfirst and comes out gasping for breath 120 minutes later.  Which is what makes this movie great but also harder to watch, especially if you've never read the books (gaaaaah!), because you're constantly trying to keep up and Yates & Co. didn't try as hard this time to explain what's going on.

LOVED McGonagall.  She dueled Snape like a BAMF then switched on the cute at Piertotum Locomotor ("I've always wanted to use that spell!")  It really is a testament to how well Maggie Smith portrayed her character when one minute you're fist-pumping as Snape "does a bunk" under her attacking spells, and the next minute she looks so genuinely frightened, you know stuff's about to go down. 

BUT! They got McGonagall's response to Pansy Parkinson ALL WRONG. After Voldemort's "give me Harry" ultimatum right before the battle, Pansy Parkinson blurts out, "He's right there! Someone grab him!" Movie McGonagall instructs Filch to toss the whole Slytherin lot into the dungeons and everyone cheers.

Which completely undermines the entire point of the HP series, which is tolerance. Book McGonagall evacuates all first years and those who don't want to fight, regardless of House. Implying that Slytherin House is chock full of spineless, self-serving, evil wizards not only contradicts McGonagall's true nature but undermines the spirit of Hogwarts. EPIC FAIL, Steve Kloves.

Snape slayed me. Hands down, "The Prince's Tale" is the best part of the movie. In clipped diction that can turn a simple retort ("No idea") into a mini-symphony of contempt, Alan Rickman shows once again how he masterfully owns every.single.minute. of screen time. REPEAT: Alan Rickman is an effing genius. He is so devastating even when he has no lines. 

I SOBBED from

until

Always.

Like shallow-breath, chest-shuddering, trying-to-hold-my-mind-together sobbing. His pain was so palpable! My heart crumbled into a million little pieces like a Dementor's buffet.

Also cried at Lupin and Tonks.  Reeaaaaching for each other yet never quite touching...

 Laying on the floor of the Great Hall, hands thisclose in death but still apart...WAH!

 

LUNA! My dear loony Luna. "Harry Potter you stop right now and listen to me!" is my favorite Luna line of all time. And even though it goes against HP canon (Neville marries Hannah Abbott), Movie Neville and Luna make me happy.  To be honest, they should have gotten together in the book.

Neville! "Yeah? You and whose army?!" LOL.

The Kiss. So cute! Love that we got to see Ron & Hermione kill Hufflepuff's cup since we never see it in the book. Great timing, too - who wouldn't make out after narrowly escaping Voldemort's water-logged effigy?

 And then there's this, which is only slightly less awkward than Voldemort hugging Draco.

BATTLE OF HOGWARTS. In a word, INTENSE. The movie adaptation did a good job of portraying the exhaustive attack on Hogwarts since the book basically laid out a blow-by-blow account of wizarding duels, which wouldn't translate well to screen.

From the sweeping shot of Death Eaters blasting spells at the protective enchantments around Hogwarts to the attacking army of werewolves/Inferi/undead monsters on the bridge, Voldemort's victory seemed imminent.  Grave danger (is there any other kind?) pervaded every corner of the crumbling castle.

Sadly, the Molly/Bellatrix duel was short and rather disappointing. It felt like the filmmakers knew they couldn't cut it and ran out of time, so they just made it as short as possible and stuffed it in somewhere. Voldemort should have seen "the fall of his last and best lieutenant."  Instead, he and Harry were flying through the air, tearing each other's faces off. 

King's Cross. Overall great scene. Understandable that they cut Dumbledore's backstory since they omitted it in HP7A, but Dumbledore was left without redemption for the Ariana kerfuffle. Good thing Movie Aberforth glossed over it all.  

But one thing that should have been a big deal for non-book-readers is that they failed to discuss why Harry can go back (that his mother's blood ties him to life, so while Voldemort lives, Harry lives.)  Did no one wonder why Harry didn't die?!

The Showdown. Not quite what I expected but okay. EXCEPT! The lack of verbal spells bothered me. Yes, shouting spells in the heat of battle may be distracting in a movie, but during The Climax of Epic Proportions? It's crucial for us to see the most Unforgiveable of Curses pitted against the simplest of spells; to see Harry defeat Voldemort not with the Killing Curse but with his signature spell! Was it really too hard to insert two (simultaneous!) lines that reveal the deepest natures of the characters?

Also, it's just a small detail, but why didn't Voldemort thud to the ground instead of disintegrating into ash? That would have underscored the point that Voldemort was just a human after all.

The Epilogue. Hilariously cringeworthy. That's all I have to say about that.

----------------------

Generally, I loved the movie.  No, it's not perfect. The editing is choppy.  I wanted them to do parts differently.

But overall? They did justice to The End.  

So, what about you? Do you agree with me or am I talking nonsense? What did I get completely wrong? Share your thoughts!

Spoiler-free Harry Potter 7B Talk

It All Ended last night. The final end of Harry Potter (unless JK Rowling writes another book. Please write another book.) No more movies; no more midnight releases; no more publicly proclaiming your love for Snape and Lily:

Seen on the metro.

I know, not everyone braved the crushing midnight crowds or has friends in high places (thank you, Greta!) but I can't help but blog about it. So how about some spoiler-free thoughts and recommendations for peeps going to see it later today or this weekend?

A. If you don't remember what happened in DH Part 1, I'd recommend watching it again before you go to Part 2. (Or get an obsessive Potter friend to fill you in.) Part 2 jumps straight into where Part 1 left off.

B. Bring tissues. Unless you have a heart of stone (or a Y chromosome), you will probably cry. Or sob. Because I wept like a baby, tears and snot running down my face and clouding my 3D glasses.

'Nuff said.

C. If you can stomach the price (or bought the recent Fandango Living Social deal), go see this in 3D. I can think of few things in the world more exciting than the Gringotts breakout or the Battle of Hogwarts in IMAX 3D.

Has a dragon been more exciting since Falcor? I THINK NOT.

Plus, your 3D glasses are shaped like Harry's!

Not my photo.

D. Neville Freaking Longbottom.

Yeah, that's right. Gryffindor badassery.

 

WHAT? Neville Longbottom, er Matt Lewis, got HOT.

E.  Stay until the end of credits then yell, "MISCHIEF MANAGED!"

Happy watching, my friends! How long must we wait before we can discuss SPOILERS?!

Hogwarts Will Always Be There To Welcome You Home

That is all.

Also this quote from Twitter (supposedly by Alan Rickman). I've been in love ever since:

 "When I'm 80 years old, I'll be reading Harry Potter. My family will say, 'After all this time?' and I will say, 'Always.'"

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! 

My friend got me advance screening tix for Thursday. No midnight wait for meee!

"The Sea Was Angry That Day My Friends..."

"... like an old man trying to return soup at a deli." (It's clicky; I just can't embed.)

(Best.Seinfeld.episode.ever.)

Speaking of angry seas, tomorrow I am embarking on a 7-day sailing trip from the Chesapeake Bay to Newport, RI.  With the in-laws. The in-law part actually doesn't bother me that much; we get along swimmingly. 

It's the 7-days-in-cramped-quarters-with-no-land-in-sight that worries me.  I've never been offshore sailing before.  I really don't want Angry Panda to erupt:

 From me or the sea.  (Note to self: download lots of Kindle books.)

 Less this:

 

More this:

If I can blog from the boat, I will.  If I'm not back in a week, I've probably been eaten by a shark. Wish me luck!

In Pictures

Damn right.

Truth.

Chocolate, peanut butter, bananas, coconut flakes. 'Nuff said.

Thank goodness.

The wisdom of children.

That is all.

Friday Five: 5 Things You'd Save In A Fire

"We didn't start the fire
It was always burning since the world's been turning"

 

  
Let's assume your house actually IS on fire and you can only grab 5 things.  What would they be? 

1. My iPhone
 
You feel totally naked and cut off from the world when you forget your phone at home, don't you? Mmmm-hmmmm. Now imagine if THE BALROG ATE YOUR PHONE and all your data is LOST TO THE ETHER FOREVER.   

The horror! The horror!

No, I don't have an addiction to technology, why do you ask? 

2. My Mac

I said, I don't have an addiction to technology. Nor do I have a fixation for Apple products.

Besides, I'd never be able to re-amass my iTunes library on the cheap. (What? Napster was legal in college.)

3. My DSLR

I have a slight obsession with photography. (On a recent trip to Italy, I took over 1,000 pictures in 7 days. That's almost 150 pics/day. Yeah.) To be fair, I keep my DSLR in a backpack with all of my lenses (also not cheap) so I'd save them too. I count them as one item since they're all in the same backpack.

4. My mom's Chinese wedding dress

She wore it at her wedding, and I wore it at mine.  I hope my hypothetical future daughter will wear it at hers. 

5. My set of Harry Potter Books

Don't judge. I have a nearly complete set of true first edition, first printings!

It's Aliiiiiiiiiive: POTTERMORE! (Part 2)

Yes, I'm still like:

 

Come on, can you blame me?  I'm not even an online gamer but DARN if Pottermore doesn't get me hooked somehow.

More photos have been released for Pottermore. (These are from Mugglenet.com)  Click on any of the photos for larger versions.

Screenshot of the Gryffindor main page:

What's with the steampunk rollercoaster?

The Hogwarts Express:

I need to know what the icons are on the left.

Christmas at Hogwarts:

Happy Christmas, Harry! Here's yet another hand-knit jumper.

Wizard's Chess Board:

Badass!

Potterwatch is now concluded. Well...until July 15th when the last movie comes out. Or July 31st. Or something else exciting comes out, whichever comes first. 

In parting, I leave you with an excerpt of the POTTERMORE press conference (full text from the press conference HERE. Definitely worth a read):

Because I can't resist, here is a great quote from the press conference:

"I don’t think I’ve given all the stuff on Quidditch yet. Men always ask me about Quidditch because the number of, and I love geeky people so I do not say this in a pejorative way, but the number of geeky men who have come up to me to argue with me about Quidditch - I’d be a lot richer if I had a quid for every one. They just think it’s illogical. But it’s not illogical and I had a speech by Dumbledore in the first book that never made it in explaining why Quidditch is not illogical, so at some point I will put that on the site. Thank you for reminding me."

It's Aliiiiiiiiiive: POTTERMORE!

I originally had a different post for today, but this morning's announcement *CLEARLY* takes precedence. Be warned - this will be a long post and there will be A LOT! OF GUSHING! WITH EXCLAMATIONS!  I'm overusing !!! and I don't care!

*JK ROWLING TALKS POTTERMORE!*

  

At long last, the mystery behind POTTERMORE is finally revealed above. And here. And here.  

POTTERMORE is the last word in Potter fandom.  In JKR's own words: 

"This was about the give-back. The technology existed to do something outside the books and films for the existing fans....I wanted to give something back to the fans that have followed Harry so devotedly over the years, and to bring the stories to a new digital generation.  I hope fans and those new to Harry will have as much fun helping to shape Pottermore as I have.  Just as I have contributed to the website, everyone else will be able to join in by submitting their own comments, drawings and other content in a safe and friendly environment – Pottermore has been designed as a place to share the stories with your friends as you journey through the site." 

Thank you, JKR!

So Pottermore is heralded as an interactive website where HP fans can share stories, interact, and blah blah blah. We already do that elsewere on the interwebs.  MORE IMPORTANTLY, Pottermore will sell digital audiobooks and finally...E-BOOKS!  (Pottermore is the exclusive place to buy HP e-books. Sorry, Amazon and B&N.)  Finally I can have ALL SEVEN bulky easily manageable volumes (4,176 pages!) at my fingertips to read whenever and wherever the hell I want! Goblet of Fire at the airport? Check. Half-Blood Prince on the flight? Double check. Deathly Hallows on vacation? Triple freaking check. No extra carry-on necessary! Don't worry, the e-books will be compatible across all digital reader formats - Harry will play no role in the Kindle v. Nook supremacy challenge.

EVEN MORE IMPORTANT than e-books, JKR announced she will be unveiling NEW MATERIAL! *reaches for inhaler* More than 18,000 new words featuring info she's been hoarding lo these many years - and that's only a third of what she's written so far!  Among these 18,00 words will be...wait for it... McGonagall's backstory - her childhood, ministry career, early heartbreak(!!!), and long relationship with Dumbledore.  We also get some backstory on Vernon and Petunia. (They met at work.) There will be a lot more content to come as Pottermore develops and grows. While not The Scottish Book (the official, definitive HP Encyclopedia) that many of us were waiting for, I can't say I'm disappointed.  I'm excited to dive back into Hogwarts again and learn something new!

::breathe in, breathe out::

In my excitement, I kind of glossed over the interactive portion of Pottermore, so let me go back.  The "interaction" is actually pretty cool - you get to digitally experience each book as if you were really a Hogwarts student.  So for the first book, Philosopher's (Sorcerer's) Stone, you're Sorted into a House by the Sorting Hat according to your characteristics (as JKR says, "You get one shot at this. It's like a Mensa test, there's no going back.") - and if you're not sorted into Gryffindor, you get to find out even more info about your House. (Ravenclaw FTW!)  The Wand Chooser also factors into your Sorting and  assigns you a wand (from over 33,000 combinations personally crafted by JKR!)  You can even visit Diagon Alley, cast spells, mix potions, and win points for your House in the race for the House Cup - just like a real Hogwarts student.

Holy moly, this is the ULTIMATE timesuck!  The second book, Chamber of Secrets, doesn't come out until 2012.  And we're only beginning!  I seriously *cannot wait* until Prisoner of Azkaban (OMG dementors! Time Turner!) and Goblet of Fire (Quidditch World Cup! Triwizard Tournament!) And Order of the Phoenix. And....okay, okay, you get the picture.

Pottermore doesn't actually beta launch until July 31 - Harry's birthday - but I am SO! FREAKING! EXCITED! about everything JKR has revealed so far.  If you sign up now on www.pottermore.com, Pottermore will send you notification for "open registration" on July 31st when an online challenge will be launched.  The first million people to complete the challenge and successfully register will get early beta access.  The rest of us unfortunate Muggles must wait until the universal launch in October.  I've been trying to register since 7am and the site continues to be overwhelmed under the crush of HP fans worldwide. Somewhere, a server is gurgling smoke and flame. Still, I keep trying!

Have YOU signed up yet?  www.pottermore.com

Road Trip Wednesday: Literally

For this week's edition of Road Trip Wednesday, I decided to take things literally and write about actual road trips.

I love road trips! Some of my best memories come from cruising across the country with my sister and our friend, E, in Frosty the Snow Car (my sister's white Honda Accord) from CA to DE. Three girls, a dog, and our own devices - the perfect recipe for adventure! Even now that a demanding full-time job and the outrageous price of gas keeps me tethered to home, my wanderlust resurfaces every so often like a gopher in the prairie. 

I recently found a journal we kept for our inaugural cross country trip circa 2001. (I think it was 2001. We didn't bother recording the year, figuring the trip was So Monumentally Unforgettable.) With help from me and E to finish some hectic, last minute packing (is there any other kind?), we finally set off from Davis, CA around midnight on a 3,000-mile adventure across I-80 with a carful of my sister's worldly possessions.  (Remember when all your worldly possessions fit inside an Accord?  Oh, to be so carefree again...)

What nobody told three clueless teenagers driving across The Northern Tundra States (Utah, Nevada, Wyoming, Nebraska) in sub-zero December temperatures is that a functional windshield sprayer is fairly essential.  When salt from the road turns your windshield into a white blindfold of death and your wiper fluid is frozen in the sprayer, necessity really becomes the mother of invention.

"BIG PROBLEM - salt from road has covered windshield. Our brilliant solution: pour windshield wiper fluid into cup with coffee residue and attempt to throw it onto windshield while speeding at 80 mph. Unfortunately, after trying 3 times, we unsuccessfully cleaned shit. Most blew into the car and 1 sq. in. of the windshield is clean. Needs improvement."

(In subsequent road trips, we refined our Prototype. Yes, Prototype was still necessary because what passes for "Non-Freezing Wiper Fluid" in CA apparently cannot withstand the arctic freeze of The Northern Tundra States. So we sawed off the bottom half of a Gatorade bottle and duct taped it to a long wooden dowel. This way, we could easily reach across the entire windshield and dump fluid on it even while maintaining cruising speed. Brilliant, if I must say so myself.)

We also gleefully discovered that the most popular gas stations across the midwest are called "Kum & Go." *snicker*

"Day 3, circa 4:20. C is swerving madly around the road. We stop to get coffee at the Kum & Go (snort!) Ironically, in the bathroom the only dispenser machine sold every type of condom known to man."

Some of the weirdest memories are random conversations borne of endless interstate monotony. This was labeled "Random Ohio Conversations":

"Question for The Ages: What is a buckeye?

C:  It's an acorn.

J and E: What!? No way.

C:  It's true. An acorn looks like a buck's eye.

E:  Oh, so strawberries should be called...rabbit's heart?

J:  That's ridiculous. What the hell kind of mascot is a buckeye? Do bucks walk around Ohio with an eye gouged out?

C:  No, that would be buck eye-less."

But really, the most important part of a road trip is the soundtrack. Unfortunately, we were novice road trippers at this point and forgot to create a mix tape. Er, mix CD?  (This was before the age of iPods. God, I'm old.)  All we had was the trusty old radio, which gladly spewed forth the same five songs across six states.

It's Been A While (Staind)

You Remind Me (Nickelback)

Hanging By A Moment (Lifehouse)

Wherever You Will Go (The Calling)

Be Like That (Third Eye Blind)

Truly, this is a dreadful soundtrack.

In summary, I greatly miss J and E. I miss our road trips. When can we cast aside mortgages and responsibilities and get back on the road again?

The Magic Will Never End

The end is nigh :(  

As you've probably guessed from my blog's name (and the first few blog entries), I am a HUGE HARRY POTTER NERD. It might surprise you to know, however, that I once refused to read Harry Potter at all. *SMELLING SALTS*  

That's right, folks. The gal who proudly sports a license plate bearing Harry's signature spell once told friends, "Those books are for kids. I'm not reading them." (It pains me to type such blasphemy. Knowing my own lips uttered those words cuts me even deeper. I bleed my own blood.) Thank the hippogriff, I came to my senses.

Now that we're less than a month away from the seventh (eighth?) and final movie, I thought I'd write my own letter to JKR from a fan's perspective. (I can't call her Jo; she's always JKR in my head.)

Dear JKR,

Thank you for bringing magic to life. Thank you for giving us a smashing new vocabulary. Thank you for introducing us to characters so real we wish they were our friends in real life.  

Thank you for bringing the joy that is reading to children everywhere - and rekindling that joy in those of us who forgot. Thank you for creating a world that kids and self-respecting adults can share together - one that can be openly discussed in classrooms, in our workplaces, and at the dinner table. Or worn on shirts suitable for public viewing.

Thank you for showing us that love will conquer evil, but victory comes with a price.  Thank you for the years of mystery, anticipation, and in the end, awe. Thank you for the story that launched a hundred billion internet friendships.  I will forever treasure the time I spent with Harry, Ron, and Hermione at Hogwarts.


Always,
Cynthia

Come July 15, I will be a sobbing, snotty mess in the theater.  I'm already misty-eyed just watching the final trailer for HP7 Part 2.

 

Road Trip Wednesday: The Elevator Pitch

Inspired by my friend, Jessica of Jessica Love Writes, I've decided to jump into Road Trip Wednesday, a blog carnival hosted by YAHighway.  Each week they ask a reading- or writing-related question and everyone who wants to participate answers it on his or her own blog. Squee! So let's get crackin'...

This week's question:

You're re-reading one of your faves when someone asks the dreaded question: "What's that book about?" Give us your best off-the-cuff blurb of any book, any genre, and have your readers try to guess the title in the comments!

Here are my takes on some classics:

1. This awkward girl and her equally weird but genius brother travel through the universe with three batty old ladies to save their dad who's being held prisoner by a Huge Brain in a planet far, far away.

2. The scariest insect known to man befriends an unlikely barn mate who reeeally wishes that Denny's never invented Baconalia, and decides to save his life.

3. A group of losers go back home to fight a batshitcrazy, bloodthirsty clown.

Can you guess what they are?

Things I Love: The Violin

Image here.

It's ironic that I now include the violin among the Things I Love. I started playing the violin in first grade, like many Asian kids. At first, the novelty was fun. I got to carry around a snappy black case with crushed velvet lining and inside was a shiny new violin. Amber blocks of rosin were squirreled away in little crushed velvet compartments (which, conveniently, also hid my prized Lisa Frank stickers. Score!) PLUS, I got out of class early to go to violin lessons. Double score!

I flew through The Suzuki Method. Twinkle Twinkle Little Star? Please. Song of The Wind? Cake. Bach's Minuets 1 through 3? Bring it x 3. I memorized each piece in record time and mellifluously performed them (in my humble, childish opinion) at school recitals. Hell yes, I was born to be a violin prodigy!

No, this is not me.

Then we moved onto more advanced pieces. But I never actually learned to read music in Book 1 of The Suzuki Method because it was easier to memorize how to play each piece rather than learn what those dotted, squiggly things on the page meant. No matter, I'll just keep do the same thing. It's gotten me this far, right? Except the more complex pieces required more practice and were harder to memorize.  I began to fight my mom tooth and nail when it came to practice time.  

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I DON'T WANT TO DO IT!! YOU CAN'T MAKE ME!!11!!!!1!1"

Harmony turned to cacophony, screeching strings, and resentment. WHATTHEHELL, nobody else has to spend hours practicing. I have to go to lessons twice a week, AREYOUKIDDINGME? I need to go to Claudia's house so we can call up radio stations and request Stevie Wonder songs.

And so it went through third, fourth, fifth, sixth, and seventh grades. I faked it for eight years before I finally couldn't take it anymore. I quit the violin. *GASP* I know it killed my parents to let me quit, especially after they bought me my own violin. But we had bigger academic fish to fry and the fight could only be sustained on so many fronts. So the violin became the second casualty in the War of Academic Aggression. (The first casualty was Chinese school.)

In retrospect, I was just stubborn and lazy. Was it really so hard to learn how to read music? Perhaps I took Cyndi Lauper too much to heart - I mean, yes, girls just wanna have fun. But couldn't they have fun and hang on to extracurricular activities?

So now twenty years later, I find myself yearning to pick up the violin again and this time, doing it right.  I want to learn how to read music. I want to play Back, Mozart, and Schumann.

But I also want to start riding horses again, and I can't do both. Aaaack! I need a Time-Turner!

Here's the Million Dollar Question:

Which childhood hobby should I revive: horseback riding or the violin?

Help me decide!